The Power of Self-Awareness in Times of Conflict
Shelly’s compassionate nature drove her to reach out to others in need, but she rarely stopped to consider her own needs. It’s a common phenomenon – we’d rather focus on helping others than acknowledging our own vulnerabilities. As mentors, we’re quick to offer guidance and support, but we often overlook our own areas of need.
Blind Spots and Unmet Needs
We’re experts at identifying the needs of others, but when it comes to our own, we can be oblivious. The good news is that there’s a simple tool to help us recognize our unmet needs: paying attention to conflict in our lives. Conflict often stems from unmet needs, whether basic or deep-seated.
Uncovering the Roots of Conflict
Think back to your last encounter with conflict. Was it rooted in a need for sleep, validation, or acceptance? Or was it fueled by a desire for control or forgiveness? When we acknowledge the underlying needs driving our conflicts, we can begin to address them.
Praying into the Ashes
A wise friend once said, “Listen for the ashes in people’s lives and then pray into them.” Ashes represent the remnants of hope, where need remains unmet. By praying into these areas, we can bring healing and transformation.
Four Ways to Grow from Conflict
When conflict arises, use it as an opportunity to:
• Invite God to reveal any unmet needs at the root of the conflict, and be open to praying into the needs of others.
• Recognize that God is the only One who can meet all of our needs.
• Open your heart to God’s help, asking Him to be the Source for your unmet needs.
• Walk beside another in prayer, praying for their unmet needs and asking God to be their Source.
God’s Promise to Meet Our Needs
Scripture reminds us that God invites us to approach His throne with confidence, seeking mercy and grace in our time of need (Hebrews 4:16). He promises to meet all of our needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).
Allowing God to Grow Us
As we seek God in our conflicts and allow Him to reveal our areas of need, He will supply what we need, equipping us to extend our hands to others in greater ways. Let God grow you in and through the deep needs of your heart.
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