Rethinking the Purpose of Singleness and Marriage
As Christians, we’re often led to believe that marriage is the ultimate goal, the key to unlocking God’s plans for our lives. But what if that’s not the case? What if God has more in store for us than just a romantic partnership?
In his book, Not Yet Married: The Pursuit of Joy in Singleness and Dating, Marshall Segal challenges this conventional wisdom. Rather than waiting passively for “the one,” Segal encourages singles to live and date with purpose, pursuing a deeper relationship with God.
The Problem with Idolizing Marriage
When we make marriage our ultimate goal, we can inadvertently turn it into an idol. We start to measure our progress and define our lives by our relationship status. But this can lead to disappointment and disillusionment when reality doesn’t meet our expectations.
Instead, Segal suggests that we focus on God’s global cause and the advance of the gospel. By prioritizing our faith and seeking someone who shares our values, we can build a stronger foundation for a future relationship.
Maximizing Your Singleness
A season of singleness is not a holding pattern, waiting for marriage to arrive. It’s a unique opportunity for undivided devotion to Christ and undistracted ministry to others. By embracing this perspective, singles can make the most of their time, pursuing their passions and serving others without distraction.
Practical Tips for Singles
- Don’t wait for marriage to start living your life. Pursue your goals and dreams now.
- Focus on building a deeper relationship with God, rather than trying to find the perfect partner.
- Look for someone who shares your values and passions, rather than just seeking a romantic connection.
- Use your singleness as an opportunity to serve others and advance the gospel.
When Singleness Lasts Longer than Expected
It’s easy to get discouraged when our plans don’t unfold as expected. But instead of defining our lives by our progress, we should focus on God’s sovereignty and goodness. By trusting in His plans, we can find peace and contentment, even in the midst of uncertainty.
Ultimately, our lives are not about our relationship status, but about our relationship with God. By prioritizing our faith and living with purpose, we can find joy and fulfillment, regardless of our circumstances.
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