How to Support Loved Ones with Mental Illness: A Guide to Building Bridges

Breaking the Silence: How to Support Those with Mental Illness

When someone we care about is struggling with mental illness, it’s natural to feel unsure of how to respond. We may avoid talking to them or unintentionally say something hurtful, not realizing the impact our words can have. However, by understanding the pitfalls to avoid and learning how to build bridges, we can provide the support and care they need.

The Pitfalls of Silence, Platitudes, and Error

Silence can be a major pitfall when dealing with mental illness. While there are times when silence is necessary, too much of it can be misinterpreted as a lack of love, concern, or sympathy. In fact, people with mental illness may even read criticism into our silence.

Another pitfall is the use of platitudes. Clichés and empty phrases like “You’ll get over it” or “Just trust God more” can come across as insensitive and dismissive. These statements often fall into one of three categories: false promises, false equivalents, or false “shoulds.” They can impose unrealistic expectations and create feelings of shame and alienation.

Error is also a significant pitfall. Condemning or criticizing someone with mental illness can be devastating, heaping false guilt on top of their existing struggles. Amateur diagnosis is another mistake to avoid, as it can be both foolish and dangerous.

Building Bridges

So, how can we build bridges instead of creating more problems? Here are three steps to take:

  1. Admit the Difficulty: Confess to God and to the person struggling that you’ve made mistakes in the past, but you want to be constructive going forward. Ask for their help in speaking wisely and helpfully into their life.
  2. Learn from Others: Talk to friends and family members of people with mental illness, and ask what has worked for them. Get permission to speak with the person’s counselor and ask how you can support their work.
  3. Ask God for Help: Pray for wisdom from above to speak truth and love into the person’s life. Ask God to give you a heart that seeks out those with mental illness and desires to spend time with them.

Conclusion

Supporting those with mental illness requires effort and understanding. By avoiding the pitfalls of silence, platitudes, and error, and by building bridges through admission, learning, and prayer, we can provide the care and support they need. Remember, it’s okay to say “I don’t know what to say,” but it’s not okay to stay silent. Let’s break the silence and start building bridges today.

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